I cheated on my fiance with a married man, Advice please?

also, the fact i cheated does not mean i dont love my ex, iv never ever done this. I just wish it didnt happen in the first place and I would not be so torn.I cheated on my fiance with a married man, Advice please?
well first of all i think your just a terrible person, nowhere in there did you say ';oh its wrong because i slept with a married man and his poor wife has no idea'; even though you say its wrong, you only say its wrong because it has complicated YOUR life. you have destroyed several peoples lives in the process. If i were you (and i pray i am never that cruel) i would get off my pedestool for a moment, look around, and focus my eyes on the trail of emotional destruction that ';just happens'; to follow you everywhere. For your ex's sake i hope you dont go back to him.. and as for you and this married man, i hope you end up together so that you can both trample all over eachothers hearts. though that would only happen if there was such a thing as justice, right?





that being said the best thing to do would be realise this man will never leave his wife, and that your ex deserves better.. and start over. be single for a while and then if you can ACTUALLY commit, try with someone new.





for the people you've wronged, i hope you find a way to make it right. come clean. as for you i seriously hope that you take some bit of moral intelligence from this expierience and never hurt people the way you have ever again.I cheated on my fiance with a married man, Advice please?
He will not leave his wife for you. If he was going to do that he would have done it already.





You have no idea what his marriage is really like and what his feelings really are, for you or for her. All you know is what he tells you. And since we've established that he lies to his wife, the woman he loved enough to marry and loves enough to go back home to every day (the woman he loves more than you, in other words), whyever would you think he is being honest with you? Get real! He's telling you - and her - whatever he thinks you need to hear in order to get what he wants. And so far, it's working.





I think you are asking the wrong question. ';Which of these two men should I concentrate on?'; is a total red herring. Neither of them is right for you. You need to concentrate on yourself and what you want out of life in the long term.





1. The married man - is married, and in any case he is a cheater. You don't want to be in the wife's position, do you? It doesn't sound like a place I'd like to be. You are fooling yourself if you think he would become a different man if he had you to go home to instead of her.





2. The boyfriend - obviously isn't the right man for you because if he was then you wouldn't be in this position. Yes people do have the occasional fling while drunk and regret it afterwards, especially when they are young and stupid. But that isn't what you did. You had an ongoing affair. Not just once and then wished you hadn't. Again and again, with all the lies (even if it was just lying by omission) and deceit that went with it. If you'd really loved your boyfriend, you couldn't have done that. You just couldn't.





I'm sure you love him in an ';I've been with you for five years, we have fun together and you're a great guy'; sense, but you don't love him in the sense of ';I'd never do anything to hurt you'; because... well, that ain't true, is it? That's the sort of love you need in order to marry someone (if you want a proper marriage), and you don't feel it for this guy.





Be straight with yourself here - if the married man had left his wife on the same day you left your boyfriend, would you even be considering going back to the boyfriend? I don't think you would. I think you are using him as a fall-back, and that's not nice and it's not fair and - more importantly from a practical point of view - it isn't going to work for you in the long term.





Whatever he was giving you it clearly wasn't enough. I don't mean sex, but everything, the whole package. It left you with something missing, something which you can't even articulate. In other words, he isn't the one you can spend your life with and be properly happy.





You did the right thing finishing with the boyfriend. Better late than never, and with luck he will never find out the real reason (I assume you have not told him).





You ought to break things off with the married man as well. I bet you don't, but you ought to and you will look back on this and wish you had. It cannot end well. Think about it - what's the ';happily ever after'; ending going to be? I can't think of a truly happy one, even if you do discount the wife's feelings entirely. This man is not a keeper.





Eventually, you're either going to get caught (in which case you will get ALL the blame), or he will find someone else and either dump you or carry on seeing you and not tell you (and you might get an STD - nice!), or you will wise up and put an end to it. That's what I predict in your future with Mr Married. Take the last option, and do it before the decision gets taken out of your hands. If he really loves you, it will be the trigger he needs to do something about it. But I bet he doesn't. Sorry.





You've just come out of a long relationship. You are not the same person that you were when you went into it. Take some time out for yourself, find out who you are and what you want. Give it six months and get some perspective.





Good luck with it!
Honestly you really should leave this married guy alone and go to your ex and talk to him. First tell him about what you have down and leave it up to him if he wants you or not. That's your best bet because if this married guy leaves his wife it won't work if he marries you, because first his wife will be heartbroken and if he had and affiar with you what makes you thing he won't do it again?
there is no way that the married guy will divorvce his wife ..so stop fooling around with him and go back to ur bf..he loves u ..and trust me there are small issues between every couple ...so go for ur bf ...
if he was gonna leave his wife he so would have done so by now! he is leading you on and is a coward he hasnt got the guts to tell his wife TRUST me if he was gonna tell her he would have by nw, go back to your boyfriend if he is willing to give you another chance he must be really nice the other guy just wants to have his cake and eat it, your better than that
Let's clear up one thing here girl.... yes, it does mean that you don't love him....otherwise you would never have cheated. You also have no respect for him....again, because you wouldn't have cheated. So spare us your torrent of bullsh*t saying otherwise. You cheated... You made a conscious decision to f*ck another man.....now pay the price. I have absolutely no sympathy for women like you. I hope your ex bf leaves you lying in the dirt...cause that's where people like you belong.
You need to do one thing.


Really search your heart and ask your self why you cheated.


It may be deep down you really want out.


think about it.
I hope he had a huge peenatha because if it was so small that he would pis-s on his balls then its a sorry waste and you should become a dy-ke
Dump the married guy, he will probably cheat on you eventually because he is not a faithful guy.





But then again, neither are you.





My advice to you is to try and patch things up with your non-married boyfriend. Be honest with him about what has been going on, and be prepared for him not to want you back, because he might not and has every right to say no.
I would say go with your ex cuz he loves you and the other one prob will never leave his wife and if he does I don't see it working leave the married man and get your man back ur ex.
stay with ur ex.
Here's the simple one instead of acting like a drama queen


Tell the truth


And


The married man obviously does love his wife


Or he wouldn't still be with her


Stop fooling yourself


It's a fling and he's probably bored of marriage
why would he buy the cow when he can get the milk for free if he cheats on his wife wat the **** makes you think he wont do it to YOU! he wont leave his wife wake up girl
Yes let's completely ignore the wife of this married man... and focus all our energy on the tramp doing her husband... poor lady... my advice is close your legs and get some help... sickening how little respect women have for one another... if you stay with this ';man'; then yes you will be hurt and honestly you deserve it... and your boyfriend is too good for you (not too bright to still pursue you) but still too good
IF this guy leaves his wife-what makes you think he won't do the exact same thing to you as he's doing to her? You had a b/f-why go for another woman's guy? That's selfish-how would you like it if your b/f had an affair with another girl?


You need to break off with the married one-anyone who cheats on their partner to be with you isn't worth your time and effort-they will do it again-to you.


You need some time on your own before you get back with your ex to sort your head out and decide what you really want-he may not be able to trust you for a long time
What is wrong with having a bit on the side? You must need loads of sex or else you wouldn't have bothered. If you don't get enough of one guy then get a bit on the side from another. No harm done.