Advice please on seeing a married man?

HERE'S MY STORY.I MET THIS GUY ABOUT 19 YEARS AGO,HE WAS MARRIED WITH A PREGNANT WIFE OF 2 YEARS.STARTED OUT JUST AS FRIENDSHIP THEN GREW INTO MORE. I WAS ALSO MARRIED .WHEN I REALIZED I HAD DEVELOPED STONG FEELINGS FOR HIM,I DIVORCED MY HUSBAND,BUT BECAUSE HE WAS ABUSIVE NOT FOR THE OTHER MAN.I STOPPED SEEING THE OTHER MAN AFTER 6 OR 8 MONTHS AND MOVED ON.I THEN REMARRIED AND HAD A CHILD AND TRIED TO FORGET ABOUT THIS OTHER MAN.AFTER 3 YEARS I THREW IN THE TOWEL WITH MY THEN HUSBAND,AND DIVORCED HIM ALSO BUT FOR REASONS I DO NOT CARE TO MENTION.I RAN INTO THE OTHER MAN AND WE PICKED UP RIGHT WHERE WE LEFT OFF AND I CONTINUED TO SEE HIM FOR ABOUT A YEAR OFF AND ON.I AGAIN BROKE IT OFF BECAUSE I KNEW IT WAS WRONG.SO I MET SOMEONE NEW AND WHILE WE WERE DATING THE OTHER MAN COMES TO ME AND WANTS TO SEE ME AGAIN BUT I CUT HIM OFF.I EVENTUALLY MARRIED THE MAN I'M WITH NOW AND HAVE BEEN FOR 10 YEARS.WITH IN THE PAST YEAR I RAN INTO THE OTHER MAN AGAIN AND WE STARTED TALKING AGAIN. THIS TIME IS DIFFERENT FROM THE TIMES BEFORE.HE TOLD ME HE LOVED ME AND THAT HE WAS GOING TO LEAVE HIS WIFE.I HAVE NEVER ASKED OR EVEN INSINUATED THAT I WANTED HIM TO END HIS MARRIAGE WITH HER.EVEN THOUGH I SO DESPERATLEY DO.HE SAYS HE WILL LEAVE HER ONCE HE CAN TRUST THAT I WON'T WALK OUT ON HIM LIKE I DID MY OTHER HUSBANDS.HE SAYS THAT HE FEELS LIKE I THINK OF HIM AS A CHALLENGE AND ONCE I GET HIM I'LL PROBALLY NOT WANT HIM ANYMORE SO THAT IS WHY HE NEEDS MORE TIME TO SEE IF MY FEELINGS FOR HIM ARE GENUINE. I TRULY LOVE THIS MAN. I HAVE FOR 20 YEARS NOW AND NO MATTER HOW HARD I TRY TO MOVE ON AND FORGET ABOUT HIM I JUST CAN'T.BY THE WAY HE TOLD ME HE LOVED ME FIRST.HE HAS BEEN CALLING ME EVERYDAY SINCE WE STARTED TALKING AGAIN AND WE SEE EACH OTHER OFTEN EVEN IF IT'S JUST FOR A FEW MINUTES.WE DON'T ALWAYS ENGAGE IN SEX,MOST OF THE TIME IT IS JUST TALKING. HE SAYS HE JUST WANTS TO BE NEAR ME AND SEE MY FACE AND HOLD ME.I KNOW WHAT WE ARE DOING IS WRONG AND I ASKED HIM IF HE EVER FEELS GUILTY AND HE SAID NOT REALLY BECAUSE HE TRULY LOVES ME. HE DOES LOVE HIS WIFE BUT NOT THE WAY HE LOVES ME.DOES ANYBODY WHO'S BEEN IN THIS SITUATION HAVE ANY ADVICE FOR ME?Advice please on seeing a married man?
You didn't have to say you don't always engage in sex... After so many years I get that....





He says all those things about how he wants to be with you and the reasons why... I'm inclined to believe him... You should know better than anyone else here if you might be happy with him full time.





He loves his wife though and so what if it's not the same love.. He loves her and that's important. Anyone can say the L word but give him a chance to prove it. If he's going to leave his wife he doesn't need encouragement to do that... He does need you're reassurance that he's the only one you have ever truly loved... Work on showing him that... And he knows what he needs to do.





I'm not being critical but If I were him... I would want the same reassurance as he has asked for (more time). What to do? Wow.... Be with him.... You love him like no other.





Incredible story by the way ~ Makes me feel like I'm just getting started. Thanks for sharing!








Advice please on seeing a married man?
If both of you like each other, continue the hidden relationship. Nothing wrong is doing what you like to do. Just enjoy the remaining life.
Yes...stop seeing him. Tell him to call when he is divorced. Then you will know if he really loves you. Also, stop typing in all caps.
IT'S CALLED ADULTERY.
STOP YELLING AT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Hi i think you two are well matched,how would you like it if your present husband was sneaking around with an old girlfriend and you where not seeing this other man,it would come like a bolt of bloody lighting out of the blue,the truth is both of you are not happy in yourselves,that's why you are both sneaking around,im not being catty with you,im being dead straight,how, in gods name is a relationship like that ever going to last,it wont %26amp; you know it,you are both lusting after each other,and don't care who you hurt as long as you are ok,well if you get with him,do you think that he will be loyal %26amp; faith-full to you,i would bet money on it that he will be up to his oul tricks all over again,its the rush he gets out of sneaking around and doesn't care who he hurts,could you love a man who doesn't care about anybody but himself,and he is number 1,but he is good with the oul talk,he wants you to commit first,so you have to break up another marriage for him,if you have any sense at all you will stay well away from him,or if you want more regrets go with him,but i will tell you something and these words will haunt you for as long as you are with him,he will do the dirt on you at the first chance he gets,set him up with some young girl and see if im right he is a dirt-bird get rid of him,


martin.
He is not leaving her. It is like jumping in a pool with a friend. You stand at the edge, holding hands. At the count of 3, we both jump in. And inevitably, one person jump and the other stand there laughing.





You are both married. He say let's both get divorced so that we can be together. He wants you to dump the relationship you are in and he will be standing there with his family! If he didn't leave her before, why would he leave her now! His main goal is to ruin your marriage so he can have you all to himself! And you will still be sharing him. Get some counseling before you call marriage #3 off!





AND GET SOME BACKBONE. NEVER START A SENTENCE WITH 'I KNOW THIS IS WRONG, BUT...'
Don't do it! Stop what you are doing now! I've been down that road and let me tell you karma or whatever you want to call it is real! It will come back around to get you for what you are doing to your current husband and to this mans wife. Why do you think all of your marriages are falling apart? If you divorce again and break up this mans home I guarantee the two of you will not end happily ever after. If it truly was such a deep love you two would have made it work two marriages ago. The next time you have sex with him go home and look your husband in the eye and try to honestly tell him you love him without feeling like a total piece of sh!t. Think of the other lives involved instead of just thinking of yourself, how would you feel if your husband was calling out someone else's name in bed while you were'nt around? It's wrong and you know it and that's why you are asking on here trying to get sympathy or for someone to tell you what you want to here. Well I don't think thats going to happen so stop it.
Yes, my advise is to NOT have contact with a married man period. You've already ruined your own life, why do it to another. Sounds like you need some serious counseling as to why you feel the need to keep going in and out of toxic relationships.





If he's married, he's married - hands off!

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